Mass Effect: Losing yourself to the Game
by Jazzy Shepard
Summary: Bioware has made the first fully immersiv gaming experience. What happens when the contestants of a testing of the game become stuck inside Mass Effect. We are unsure what death in the game means at this point but we caution you to make non-dangerous decisions.You must the destruction ending. Any Other ending will end in termination of the Contestant.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own Any of the Mass Effects or Bioware; however I love the amazing games and great company. If you have not tried any of the Mass Effect trilogy, Dragon Age, or any of the amazing Bioware games I suggest you go to the store right now and buy them all. I'll wait... Done? Okay let's begin._

**_Prologue_**

**_Warning kinda boring but contains kinda but not really vital information skip to chap 1 if you get bored. If all you want is to jump straight into the Mass Effect action. Chapter 2 is what you want._**

I waited excitedly in line with my younger brother. Bioware had announced a testing trial of a fully immersed version of Mass Effect 3. They would take a certain number of people within the age range of 18-25 (For health reasons) of different sexes and races to get the game fully down. That's all we really knew at this point. Anyway, as I was saying, My brother Gabe and I stood in line at the newly built "Gaming Arena" in Oklahoma City. We held the tiny USB's with our saved games in excited hands. Two men walked out of the second set of doors grumbling about 'unfair'. In seconds a well dressed man came out the doors with a mega phone, "Excuse me all volunteers! We have filled all slots for every male participant. We are still looking for female participants. Will any and all females please make a line behind me!"

I glanced at Gabe as his face fell, "Come on bro, I bet we get a free copy when I win." I winked and he gave me a bear hug, "Good luck, I'll be watching the games!" He yelled clearly through the males shouting their unhappiness. As I walked over to the man I was a bit relieved to only see four other females with me, "Since there are so few We will go ahead and interview all of you together." The man nodded for us to go in. The walls were a dark black with red carpet, "We have 20 Rooms to store contestants. If you are chosen you will stay here for three months, your contact with the outside world will be limited to your family." A red head girl behind me shouted over my head making me wince, "SIR! What are the rooms for?" she asked and he smiled, "I can only tell you once you are selected and sign our contract. Now, if you are selected the company will pay you a great sum for helping us with this testing. We will even pay the rent and bills on your home during this time if you are the primary adult." The man opened a great grey door into a white room. Three men and a woman sat behind a table.

'Please stand in a line in the middle of the room." The woman said softly. Each girl rushed to be in front and even pushed each other. I stood back and gave the man that escorted us a look. He smiled. I couldn't see the girl in front but I could hear the questions being asked rapidly. Definitely something they had been doing all day

"Age?"

"19."

"Name?"

"Alice M."

"Okay Mrs. Alice, when you play the game are you Paragon or Renegade?"

"I'm not sure what that means, Is that like a race?"

"Mhmn, So why do you want to be apart of this testing?"

"My friends talked me into it."

The elderly man on the left nodded to the escort man and he walked forward, "Thank you for taking the time to come down here Mrs. Alice. Have a good day." The girl smiled and left babbling to the man, "I knew I wasn't gonna get in but had to try you know. Alotta money!" I smiled and listened as two other girls had been shown away. One girl screamed and tried to attack one of the interviewers. The red head in front of me stepped forward.

"Age?"

"22."

"Name?"

"Brittney Davis."

"Okay Mrs. Davis, How do you play Mass Effect?"

"Well, My Shepard is an Earth born Ruthless woman. She is as Renegade as she can get but cares about her crew. In Mass Effect 2 she saves everyone and keeps the Collector data. I always choose the Destroy ending in Mass Effect 3. Kill em all. I think. Unless it's for my crew I rarely do side missions. I killed Wrex and Mordan. My romance is Kaidan all the way. He is adorable in a puppy dog kinda way. I am a soldier through and through. Hate using biotics."

" Okay Mrs. Davis, Follow that gentleman there he will take you into the information room where you will sigh a contract and receive information about the program." The girl nodded and walked out with a smile. Oh no... fuck fuck fuck fuck! I'm out I knew it!

"Age?" The man in the middle asked me. He seemed to be the youngest and smiled gently as if he knew. Oh God.. please let me stay.

"19." I stated calmly though my hands shook.

"Name?"

"My name is Jasemin Carly."

"Okay Mrs. Carly, How do you play Mass Effect?"

"I believe Shepard is a good commander. My Shepard is a Spacer and a War Hero. As much as I would like to say that my Shepard is a pure angel she isn't. I definitely love some of the Renegade options. My favorite one is punching Admiral Gerrel for shooting on the Geth ship while Shepard and her team were still inside." The woman and old man crack a smile, " But my team is my family, I didn't even know Wrex could die in the first Mass Effect or Talia in 3 until I watched other playthroughs. I had no idea your team members or even Shepard could die in 2 for the longest time. I romanced Kaidan in Mass Effect but went to Garrus in 2 after Horizon. And after the bitchy note Kaidan sent to Shepard I stayed with Garrus in 3 and didn't feel bad in the hospital scene, please." The woman gave a soft laugh, "I have all the DLC _Zaeed, Kasumi, and Javak_. In the end of Mass Effect I chose Synthesis so that the Galaxy might finally be at peace and a chance that the Reapers didn't backfire Shepard's control in the future. Destruction was never an option for me."

Each person slipped a piece of paper into the young man's hand. He nodded, "Alright Mrs. Carley, Follow that gentleman there he will take you into the information room where you will sigh a contract and receive information about the program." I smiled and ran forward shaking every person's hand, "Thank you so much!" I squealed, "Good luck!" The woman said and I grinned.

Seconds later I was in another white room. The Escort man sat on the other end of the table, "I'm Brad." He stuck his hand out. I took it and shook gently, "Jasemin but I like to be called Jazz." He nodded and smiled, "Well Jazz it looks like you filled our last female spot. Congradulations. Alright I'm going to give you these papers to sign. Listen to me carefully." He leaned forward and became all business, "No Makeup or jewelry is allowed in here. No phones, no computers, though we do have a big gaming room during your off time. If you feel that the reality of the game and this reality is becoming confused you talk to a counselor immediately. During testing we take an hour break every two hours for time for your brain and body to relax. We require you eat between every testing no matter what. If you need longer than an hour for a break do not hesitate to say something. Now, we will be monitoring your body and mind the entire time. You will be in a room much like this one. We will have you hooked up to different machines and wires to submerge you into the world. You will feel the pain in the game as if it were real, If you feel like you need to take an early break we will show you how to leave the game via the Omni tool during your tutorial. During this time your body belongs to our company, we will pay for anything that happens to you during this stay. As I said before do not hesitate to contact any of our staff for your needs. Any extra information will be ready upon your request." I smiled and handed him the signed papers he nodded, "I'll need your purse and anything in your pockets. I will also need you to change into this." He handed me a pair of white sweats and a Blue T-Shirt with the words 'Paragon Girl' On them. I hugged him tightly. I MADE IT!


	2. Chapter 2

**1.**

**Getting Used to the game.**

Almost instantly they put me into a room to test my bodies reaction to the game, "So we are going to put you under for an hour and test everything from your muscle movement to your minds reaction. We will wake you up in the game." My personal Nurse Francia Placed a needle into my inner arm. Almost instantly I opened my eyes in a black room. A soft female voice rang out, "Tutorial active. Choose a name." I felt like I was standing under a spotlight, "Uh... Jazzy." The voice thought for just a moment, "Your name will be Commander Jazzy Shepard, is this correct?" I nodded and then felt stupid for my idiot self, "Yes." A green light lit up around me and a soft ding sounded.

"Please choose an appearance, Please remember that your appearance will remain the same once you awaken this is simply a choice for the game." I nodded and sighed. Personally I thought my weight, height, and skin tone was perfect... but my face. Instantly the mirror opened to show an enlarged portrait of my face. My nose could be smaller. My hair a bit longer, red, and in a ponytail With a piece off on each side framing my face. I watched my face change slowly. My scalp burned for a moment before hair tickled the back of my neck and sides of my face. Sharp blue eyes stared from tan skin and red hair. The bangs curled around each side of my face a if hugging it. On demand my lips became a bit fuller and red. Eyeliner made the perfect 'cat eye' in an instant. I was done.

The area flashed green and a ding was heard. The mirror became full body size again, "Choose a Background." I thought a moment, "What about my save file?" I asked and the computer voice whirled, "Six saved games ready for import for,,, Jasemin Carly." Instantly my characters popped up. I gasped and leaned back. Each woman gasped and leaned back, "Can I keep the same look?" I asked out loud and the computer whirled, "Yes, pick a background." I smiled. I looked at the smiling pixi with black hair. A Spacer and War Hero she was my favorite because she was an Adept. The Computer whirled and a green light shown, "Commander Jazz Shepard. You have chosen a Spacer, War Hero, and Adept. Is this correct?" "Yes." I said looking into the mirror. Damn I make a fine red head, "Tutorial act one complete beginning Act 2."

The scene shifted around me. A green grassy area came into my view. Kaidan shimmered to left on my right. I jumped and took a step back. He was so life like, "Hello Commander, I am here to help you grasp the basics of movement, are you ready to begin?" He asked. God he was fucking hot. He smiled gently, "Why you?" I asked and he nodded, "I am Adept as well Shepard. The program taught me to teach you the basics, are you ready to begin?" he asked and I nodded, "Good. There is a small silver band on your right arm. That is your Omni tool. Press the small black button to make it appear. Good, now all controls will be the same as in a normal game." I nodded as I looked through Settings, Squad, Inventory, and the rest, "WHen the Omni tool is up the game will pause unless you are using it for an in game item such as scanning. Touch the red button to scan." I did so and he nodded, "Good. Now Walk to me." Kaidan disappeared and appeared a few yards from me. I huffed in irritation. I hated tutorials. I was stuck for some reason. My body didn't move. I began to panic, "Calm down, Shepard. Don't think of your limbs as you do when you are awake. Think of moving them. Try again, walk to me." I relaxed and just imagined myself walking to Kaidan. In a few strides I was at his side, "Good. Now run to me." Kaidan disappeared and appeared a few feet ahead. I ran quickly to him and ended up breathing heavily, "As in reality you will end up tired in the game. Remember you can always take a break from the game and rest." I nodded and Kaidan mimicked me, "Now for some basic Biotic moves."

In what seemed like hours I lay gasping in the grass with Kaidan laughing, "You have the hang of it Shepard." I rolled my eyes as my limbs quickly weakened. Red lights flashed on the edge of my eyes. Kaidan's face twisted, "Error, Contestant 20 body is stressed. Error, all personnel to Contestant 20's room. error." I gasped as a bright light dug me from the grass. I sat up and threw up into a bucket someone was holding. I faintly noticed Francia pulling back my hair and pealing something off of my face, "It's okay honey, you lasted longer than any of the others. It's just the medication they gave you during the initial test. It wont happen again. Let's get you something to eat." Kind honey eyes met mine as Francia helped me to stand, "You are the only one to finish the tutorial today." Brad said helping me get out of the room. Six people crowded around a machine muttering to each other, "You even woke yourself up before you could get sick. Only Carol and Caleb were able to do that besides you. Everyone else kept the janitors busy." I gave Brad a smile, "Is it always that rough?" I asked and Brad shook his head, "Oh no. We allow five minutes in and out for the body to adjust. You should feel better after you eat." I nodded again my head throbbing.

"Oh man and Liara wooo she looks good." The black girl whose name I learned was Flora made everyone laugh, "Who'd you get Jazz." She asked raising an eyebrow, "I'm an Adept so I got..." "Kaidan me too up top." A skinny man with glasses said. I met his high five with a laugh. There were only five of us still up. The first fifteen had already gone to bed due to headaches. Mine was pretty bad but I was still up from the awesome experience, "Ice cream anyone?" A skinny blond woman walked in with ten bowls filled with different types of ice cream. I quickly snagged the mint chocolate ship and nommed away, "Thank you!" rang out as she left. Mira and her boyfriend Greg shared one, "So were the only kinda full Paragon's huh." Flora said pointing to our blue shirts. I shrugged, "I think so. everyone else had either red or purple on. I think purple is kinda a mixture." Glasses said. As my spoon hit the bottom of my glass I sighed, "Alright guys. I'm off to bed. See y'all for breakfast. Everyone waved as I left to climb into the softest bed in the world. Tomorrow was a new day.

* * *

I cried and held my chest. That boy had exploded in the ship it was so real. The reaper's roaring in my ear, leaving Anderson. That boy always got me. I instantly pressed the button on my Omni tool and had jumped out of the game. A Tech guy smiled from his machine, "Everyone says when you first hear the Reapers is the worst." He commented slowly taking the things off of my skin, "Yeah, it was pretty bad." I breathed and rubbed my eyes. He pushed something into my hand. I fingered the apple, "Your file says you love them. We try and keep your favorite snacks around when you wake up. It helps your body not drain as much." He said typing away on the computer, "Go ahead and clear your head, come back when you're ready. We have three whole months. A few short cycles won't hurt. I gave a grateful smile and walked out the door. Flora walked out of the door to my right with tears streaming down her face, "That boy." she whispered and we hugged tightly.

"God you Parra's are pussys." A girl in a red shirt snorted before biting into her sandwich, "Oh no the Reapers are here, the boy is dead. What the Fuck ever I'm already to the Citadel, Beat that bitches." A boy gave her a high five as I turned my head. Mira raised her eyebrows, "You walked out of your room the same time as me, Clara. Last I remember you woke up screaming because of the Reapers." The girl turned red and glared, "Whatever." She mumbled. "Attention all Contestants please return to your rooms. If you feel sick please report to the Nurses office." I Gave Flora a wink, "See you on the other side."


	3. Chapter 3

**2.**

I felt a tear slide down my face as the game continued from where I jumped out. The red lights and noise made me flinch again before I turned and walked into the Normandy, "Where are we going?" Kaidan asked making me look up. His face held real emotion. Fear, anger, and even sadness. My hunk of a trainer left behind in favor of the man in front of me, "The Citadel." I said back finding my voice. I was Commander Fucking Shepard, get it together girl. A hand landed on the bench besides mine, "We have to go back Shepard, Earth our home is being destroyed, Anderson is still out there. We're running like cowards..." I turned and pushed the arm back, "I know James!" I screamed as anger boiled in my chest and throat, "We have to go to the Citadel and get help Anderson's orders... My orders." I opened my fingers and looked at the dog tags before slipping them around my neck. I touched the armor. Flashed of the older games came into my mind's view. I felt sadness now. I took a deep breath and suited up as if I had known how to do it for years, "Lola.." James started and I touched his arm, "I know. I feel it too." We walked to the elevator and my fingers instantly pressed 2. The Orange light turned green as the elevator whizzed up.

I walked to Traynor and shook her hand before running off. James crossed his arms and hummed, "What was that about?" he asked and Kaidan rolled his eyes, "Joker's her best friend. She says he has been the only one with her since the day they gave her the Normandy." His face pulled before he turned to talk with Trayner. I walked up the catwalk and watched the chair turn. A grin spread from my heart to my face. Here he was a real fucking person. Joker sat with a cocky grin and his arms open and waiting. I had to stop for a moment and realise that this was just a game, "Hey Commander. Don't leave me hanging." I grinned and gave a soft laugh before hugging him as gently as I could, "Missed yeah Shepard." he muttered and I gave him a soft kiss on the cheek.

_The guy monitoring Competitor 20's gameplay sat back and waved a manager over, "She is changing the gameplay. I.." The woman smiled and put a hand on the man's shoulder, "It's okay corporate called us with the findings from Europe, Those who import their games while inside add emotional feelings to it. Since the gameplay is based off of their minds interpretation the game will add to it." The man shook his head, "Look at these readings, what of their moments of reality. How many of them thought they were Commander Shepard!?" The manager patted his hand, "Don't worry about it. We will take it out when the final game is released until then. We have therapy and free treatment." The man turned and watched 20 talk to Admiral Anderson on the vid com before setting coordinates on the map. She then turned and laughed as James grabbed her by the waist and started to dance with her. The man at the computer grit his teeth together. This would not end well._

I jumped out of the ship first and felt my suit tighten around my body to protect me from the wind. The shields buzzed around me, "Looks like a storm coming in." Kaidan said, "Better get outta the way when it gets here." I said in a snarky tone before jumping off the ladder, "Woh Lola, take it one step at a time." I took a few steps back, "Come on James! Feels good to be out and..." I tripped backwards, "What?" I had forgotten about him. My breath hitched in my throat. He was so real. His mask had broken open to expose blood and eyeballs that popped out of his head, "Alliance." Kaidan said without feeling as James pulled me to my feet.

As we walked down the dirt path Kaidan noticed them first. He gently pushed me behind a rock, "Cerberus." He muttered, "What are they.." I flinched and shut my eyes as four shots rang out. I took a deep breath and looked from behind the rock, "James use carnage on that big guy right there, Kaidan use warp on the guy with the armor." I stood up and threw the tiniest person. He hit a rock and crumpled to the ground. I pulled my assault rifle up and took care of two guys like I was an expert. Almost as if I had been training for a while. I smiled and bit back a giggle. James quickly finished off three guys while Kaidan threw a guy off the edge of the rock.

"Cerberus, what are they doing here?" I asked, knowing this part by heart. Kaidan turned to me, "I would have asked you the same thing." Kaidan nearly bit at me, "I told you, I'm not with them anymore. End of it. Let's keep moving." We walked right into the second patch, "More of 'em!" James yelled. I pulled my gun up and unloaded a clip easily into three guys. They fell as a lifted man was shot down by James' carnage. I took in a deep breath. It was just a game. Blood leaked onto the sand and made me bite my lip. Just a game. Kaidan and James picked up clips and even handed me one. I popped the heat clip easily and slid another one into place as if I had done it a million times before. We entered the elevator and pulled off our masks. I was ready for Kaidan.

The lights had turned a soft green, "Attention Competitor 20, two hours have passed prepare for extraction." I closed my eyes and waited to fall into a short sleep. The world around me turned red, "Error.. error... Minor malfunction in retrieving the competitors. Resume gameplay, do not panic." The world slowly started to move again.

"How do we know you don't work for them?" Kaidan asked and I turned my head. My heart was already pounding from the error scratches in my ears, "They brought me to life, I owed them. At first they wanted to save humanity and now... I don't work for them." Kaidan turned his head and waved his hands, "You could have easily..." James put a hand on my shoulder and gently wrapped his arm so that I was behind him, " Commander Shepard had been under constant surveillance on Earth. Nuthin in or out. We would have known." I squeezed James' arm gently, "Gracias Hermano." I spoke and he took my hand gently, "De nada, Lola."

We raised our guns as the door opened. A few steps in and we heard banging from the vents. Unlike the boys I smiled and leaned back. The vent door popped open as Liara jumped from the hole. I pushed the guns down of my boys before walking forward. Two gun shots later and Liara turned to smile at me, "Shepard." she said in a soft tone. I always loved how calm and gentle she was. As I walked forward she grabbed my hand gently and squeezed, "It's good to see you." She smiled.

The world stopped again and flashed green, "Attention Competitor 20, two hours have passed prepare for extraction." I gave a soft puff of air and waited for it to wake me up. The green light around me went red. I let out a groan, "Error.. Error.. Major malfunction in retrieving the competitors. Competitors 20-1 do not panic we are experiencing technical difficulties. We are unable to extract you from the game nor are you able to exit via Omni tool. We are placing each of you into a stasis and putting the games on autopilot. You are able to leave upon completion of the game. We look forward to seeing you wake up." My senses died away from my body leaving me to stair from Shepard's eyes. I watched her bob her head and move her arms but I couldn't hear her speak. I began to panic. I was stuck.

_The computer man typed away at his computer, "20 is on the brink of a panic attack, 18 has fallen asleep and seems to have gotten out of the program." Red lights and alarms blazed through the area, "ATTENTION ALL STAFF MEMBERS COMPETITOR 6'S VITALS ARE FALLING. IMMEDIATE ATTENTION TO ROOM 6!" The computer guy watched the games flow on autopilot. Fuzz was where 18's should have been and 6 lay on the ground with a game over screen. The guy clicked the revive button on number 6 but it would not reset. He took in a deep breath and pressed it again. He picked up a phone and dialed '0'. Not even a ring and it was up, "Yes." The female voice snapped, "6 won't revive." he said and the woman sighed, "6 is dead... we need to send in a message. Any in game death will result with a death in real life. 18 has slipped into a coma... this is all fucked up. After what happened in Europe..." She paused and computer man shook with anger, "What should it say..."_

Time slowed to a stop as I watched the Commander reach out for the woman running into the car, her mouth frozen on James' name, "Attention, Attention all Competitors, Our systems have malfunctioned. For an unknown reason all contestants are stuck inside of the games reality. We have reports from England that by beating the game you are able to awaken immediately. Due to stress on your bodies and minds we are unable to move any of you to a hospital but are taking care to hire doctors and move necessary equipment in immediately. Be mindful of death and damage, we are unsure what death in the game means at this point but we caution you to make non-dangerous decisions. When the ending of the game arrives you must have the max amount of power behind you and pick the destruction ending. Any Other ending will end in termination of the Contestant. Stay safe contestants we look forward to seeing your eyes open again."

The game resumed and I took in a deep breath James crashed into the vehicle carrying the woman and she jumped out grabbing Kaidan and ramming him against the metal. I shook from the news and felt a few tears slide down my cheeks. I shot her over and over until she fell. Then I shot her some more, "Lola! LOLA!" Arms wrapped around me as I fell into the sobbing. I was stuck inside this game. I grabbed onto James shirt and screamed, "Kaidan will be okay Commander, I promise." He whispered urgently patting my hair down, "Nosotros lo salvaremos, Lola. Nosotros lo salvaremos." "Sé...sé"


	4. Chapter 4

**3.**

I sat holding Kaidan's hand between my fingers. His body was so damaged and so lifelike. I had already slipped my finger into some red by accident and had felt the warm thick blood. My chin wobbled a bit as my heart broke. Unlike in the game I had to ride out each FTL jump without a cutscene. Every emotion I felt seemed to hit me tenfold while I was able to touch and hold these people. Kaidan moved slightly under my touch, "Hey.. hey shhh." My eyes trailed down to some metal that stuck out at a strange angle from his arm. His grip tightened on my hand. I silently pleaded that he went back to sleep. Everything was so real with him. His ragged breathing. I let his hand fall and walked away in a short huff of anger. This was just a game...

The medical doors opened as I took a step outside. How could I be Commander Shepard? Everything I was, was perfect programming and fake memories. How long until they overtook me. A hand took mine before arms wrapped around my body, "Geez, Lola. I thought you hated him." I leaned into James against my better judgement. If I was stuck inside this game I was going to enjoy my stay, "Come on, girl, show me that famous Commander Shepard. You know that you remind me of my sister too much to let you go on like this." As if the game didn't know what to do a shock entered my head to create a small headache. I could see the memory as clear as day.

_James was escorting me to the lunch room after dark. I had grown tired of the strange looks I had received. Not only with working with Cerberus but an alien relationship as well. Gossip hit the town hard. I was laughing about something he said, "No really, poor guy was wailing for his mamá all while the other trainees were sitting there laughing at him." I smiled up at him with my hands crossed, "But I'm guessing you were a perfect caballero, mmm?" I asked gently bumping into him. He gave a pained face, "Why Lola! I never!" he teased my accent and I rolled my eyes, "I like it so shuddup." He gently pushed me before we walked in. A few stragglers sat in a corner table. I could feel my face heating up, "Olvidarse de ellos, Lola." I grabbed a tray and turned to sit at a table. James slid in besides me before going face first into his cake. I gave a soft laugh, "Slow down, child." I muttered and he gave me a frosting smile. I shook my head, "Why do you treat me so differently?" I finally asked as my question knotted worry in my gut. He swallowed his bite and looked at his hands as if deciding what to say, "Well, you remind me of my sister before she died. The same red hair and blue eyes. The way she would use spanglish with me, even as our parents wanted us to speak only spanish.. ehhh. You are kind, gentle and funny." he raised an eyebrow and went into flirt mode, "Thank you, James. I need friends. Family. I'm glad you're here." His face fell into a gentle smile, "Familia de por vida." He said lifting a glass, "Familia de por vida." I followed._

"Where are you going, Commander?" James asked as he suited up. The Emergency Vehicle had already come to take Kaidan a few minutes ago, "I'm going to head to the hospital and then to Udina's office. I'll radio you when we get ready to leave." James nodded as he left through the decontamination chamber. A soft hand landed on my shoulder, "Hey Shepard." I looked over to Joker, "Hey Jeff." I muttered and gave him a look, "Going out like that?" He asked and I gave a shocked face, "Come on a N7 sweater and a pair of jeans. Classic." Truth be told I was more comfortable in the clothing that I would wear back in my... I smiled at Joker, "What's your plan?" I asked and he sat back opening a computer screen, "Stuff, Hey commander." I stopped at the decomp doors, "Yeah?" I asked and he gave me the saddest face I had ever seen on that man, "Glad to have you back." I smiled and walked through the gentle mist and into the Citadel.

I pulled up My Omni Tool and pressed the grey button. A map appeared in front of me with the known locations of my teammates. Their dogtags each had a signal that the Alliance could use to find them. I held a hand to my head as this new information jumped up as if I had known it for years, "Well hello Commander Shepard." I looked up and smiled, "Captain Bailey." I said giving him a handshake, "It's Commander now, Jazz." I laughed, "Of course." He smiled back, "Well, I'm supposed to take you to the Council." I leaned against the railing with a grin, "Supposed to." I mocked faintly and he chuckled, "Well, They are expecting you once you visit Major Alekno." I nodded my thanks and touched his arm gently. He walked me to the elevator and pressed the button to the hospital. He acted so human. I was unsure as to when the awe moments would go away but at the moment they were still here. I turned and shook his hand again, "Thank you, Commander." I said and gave a short laugh at the face he made, "I'll see you again soon."

I turned and took in a deep breath. Everyone seemed to stop and look at me as I passed. A gentle silence followed my footsteps as I walked straight into the back. My hand hesitated at his door, "He is stable, Commander." A nurse offered me gently and I turned to give her a smile. She nodded her head and motioned that I should walk through, "Kaidan." I whispered as a headache filled my mind. Tears started to run down my face as my emotions became stronger. I suddenly remembered our first night together. It was so strong. Why did I ever pick Garrus over him?

"Kaidan, you need to get better. The Alliance needs you... I need you. I know I've done stupid things in the past and... Please. Everything is going to be okay. You are in great hands and I will make sure you get everything you need. Please... please wake up." I stopped my self and wiped my face dry. Hmn no watery makeup, liking the future already. It was just a game get it together. I gave a soft blow of air, "On your feet Major, that's an order." I whispered with a bit of force and turned to leave. Two doctors and a nurse looked as if they were going to start crying but dispersed so that I could walk through. Just one more thing before I go to the meeting. I looked at Thane and smiled. Doctor Chakwas stopped me before I got too far, "Commander!" she greeted me. Thane's head shot up and his eyes met mine. I turned to talk to the doctor, "Hello." I said before she pulled me in for a hug, "Good to see you, how have you been?" she asked and I sighed, "I'm having to build an army against the reapers. Luckily for me I have the Normandy. " The Doctor sighed with a dreamy look in her eyes, "A ship that you belong on. Go and pack were leaving in the next hour." She gently squeezed my shoulder, "Thank you." I hugged her tightly, "I trust no one more than you, Doctor."

I walked to the window and acted like I was peering into the city, "Shepard." I turned to look at Thane. Nothing could have prepared me for how lifelike he looked. Every scale and fleshy part of him moved. He looked a bit tiny but not more than that. His eyes looked like two black pools of water that rippled everytime he closed his eyes, "Thane." I whispered gently. He touched my arm and I had to note the surprisingly smooth texture to his hands though the folds were a bit wet. Kinda gross!

"We could use you on the Normandy." I tried knowing the answer, "I'm dieing, Shepard." he whispered and I felt my heart seize again. Fuck me and these feelings. Now I know why Shepard had to be a hardass, "Thane, I miss you on the ship. Being able to talk to about anything, my past." The words flowed by themselves now. Knitting themselves together using the thread of memories that didn't exist. He let go of my arm, "My son is coming to visit me in my final moments. Will you be there?" he asked and I nodded holding my fists together to keep them from shaking, "Yes, Of course. For you Thane anything." He nodded and sat back. I stood to leave. A memory flashed into my mind making me take a breath.

_Thane sat on the other side of the table as I laughed. His joke long forgotten but the feeling left behind warm and fuzzy. He placed his hands together, "You and Garrus seem cozy." he said gently and I nodded, "Hearing his voice had always been comforting to me. Just the little things you know. 'Right behind you'. Hearing that especially now... An old friend who never left my side." Thane gave a half smile, "He uses it to hide his own." I giggled gently and pushed the feelings of anger aside. He meant nothing of it. He was a bit jealous and I knew it. He was still my friend, "I actually need to go." I said standing, "Goodbye." I offered and he sat back not saying anything, "Are you mad at me?" I asked and he shook his head, "I do not like saying goodbye to you, Shepard. It means there is a chance we won't meet again." _

My fingers pressed the button on the elevator and it moved. How the hell am I going to deal with all of these emotions at one time? Fuck this game, this trial, fuck everything. I punched the metal of the elevator and winced. My knuckles gave a protest as I gently squeezed my fist. Nothing broken, good. A headache flashed in my mind. Goddamnit is it going to do that everytime I get random knowledge that only Shepard would know. I walked to Udina's office from my own memory of the levels and met the nice Asari lady, "Udina said you would be coming. Here I will guide you to the Counsel. They are already in session." I nodded as she lead me to the room. My insides twisted together tightly as she motioned for me to walk along the suspended catwalk.

"We have our own problems, counselor. Earth is not in this alone." The turien spoke making me gasp softly. His voice was so different in life. The grace of his movements and the way his mandibles fluttered in speech. And his structure was much bigger than I was prepared for. he almost looked like a scoop of icecream in a bowl. I hid my smile. I reentered the conversation as the salarian spoke, "By your reports." he snipped and Liara shook her head taking a spot to my right, "The reports are correct. I escaped while the Reapers touched ground and began to destroy our home." Udina gave a smug smile and motioned at me with his arm in a 'SEE I WAS RIGHT' motion, "This is just the beginning, we need your help. Anything and everything you can spare, please. If they spread or take one of us down we are doomed. Every race, every living being, every planet." The asari councilor looked a bit miffed, "Each of us faces a similar situation even now the Reapers are pressing on our borders. If we lend you our strengths to fight our own worlds will fall." Udina turned as his face twisted into a rage, "We must fight this thing together.

The Salarian turned and mocked the human's face, "And we should just follow you to Earth!?" The Turian kept his head and smoothly stopped the Turian, "Even if we were to unite our fleets, you really believe we could defeat the reapers?" he asked and I nodded. Liara pulled up her Omni tool, "We have found the blueprints for a weapon against the reapers." I nodded, "The remnants of the human fleets are beginning to gather resources to build the machine." I added. The Salarian raised his skin and showed me more of his eye. Oh goodness ew just ugh don't, "And you believe this will stop the reapers?" he half asked and half challenged. Liara stood her ground and continued speaking, "It looks extremely easy to build, if we work together." she finished. The Asari council woman spoke in a smooth language I couldn't understand. Liara spoke back calmly and the council members nodded their heads, "Remind me to get you a translator ship." Liara gave gently after seeing my confused face.

The Turian spoke last, "And you really believe this is our best chance against the reapers?" He asked again staring directly into my eyes as he spoke. I felt as if he trusted me slightly, "Both Liara and I believe it will work. I believe that if we all work together this weapon will save us all." he nodded his head and leaned back. After a few moments of the Counselors covering their asses and running Udina and I walked to his office. He banged on his window and sighed putting his forehead to it, "They are scared and are running with their tails between their legs." I nodded and rubbed my chin, "Wouldn't we?" I asked and he looked up to glare at me. I was running off script and I knew it but oh fucking well, "If the Reapers were focused on the Asari, wouldn't we gather in the back with the other races and build as the Asari fell. And what if the whole race was destroyed. Oh well, there are still Asari on the Citadel and Omega. Maybe hiding with the Turian or even Krogan. The truth is, they are doing what they think is right. Though it is wrong. We would have too." Udina turned red in the face as I heard the gentle clanging of a slow Turian clap, "I have a mission for you, Commander. One that will add my support though at this point I truly think you deserve it." I turned and smiled thinking of Garrus, "Anything to help, Counselor."

_**A/N **__** In later chapters she won't think as much about her emotion in a 'video game' as much and will fall into an easy step while becoming the Commander in her eyes. I will try and do a full chapter for each mission as well as add little fluff of the Commander interacting with people. Parties, conversations, and eating together will be a few of these settings. I will also be doing all DLC missions including the Citadel mission. In this Fic Garrus will be staying in the Commander's room after a while. A few warnings to those who only want an 'insert me' fic. Mine is tied to the real world. Every Once in a while the computers will try and remind The Commander of that when she begins to fall into the reality, and she will try her hardest to enjoy the game without falling into it on a reality level. As always Review, Favorite, and Follow. I will be posting new chapters every Monday-Tuesday. If I feel a bit excited over one I might jump the gun and post it a little early. If I end up writing a little fluff convo piece I will just post it the day I finish it so those are kinda of unexpected and random. Thank you so much for reading and I hoped you enjoyed it.**_


	5. Chapter 5

**4.**

_**If you want I was listening to "Levitate" by Favright on YouTube's Tasty Network during the writing of this chapter. Fair warning it is Dubstep. I know I'm a bit behind on posting, so sorry. Getting ready for Collage.**_

I pulled up my Omni tool and sat in the seat next to Joker playing a future version of ping pong. I sat with my feel up and my hair pulled into a messy bun. Though the mission was top priority we still had four hours before we got there. Everything around us kind of.. dragged. Liara was busy with her shady shit, and James would only talk to me if we trained together. Traynor and I already spoke about getting her toothbrush and that she found something strange with grissom academy. We would go there next. Until then, Joker leaned back with his cap over his eyes in a nap as I watched the screen. Well, sort of. I stopped and thought of my brother. I don't know why it happened but it did. His smile and great attitude. My mother, her grey eyes, but wonderfully full chocolate brown hair. A trait we shared... Used to share. I pulled on a loose tendril of red hair. I bit back a sob and continued my game.

Someone began to shake me gently, "Come on Commander, Half an hour before we reach Palaven." I shot a sleepy grin at Joker, "But nap time is fun time." I yawned and he shook his head, "Trust me, I know. But you need to get suited up. Liara and James are already getting their weapons strapped on. I rolled my shoulders and stood up patting Jeff's head softly, "Thanks." I muttered and he gave a soft smile, "You looked beat. I'm guessing you haven't slept in a while." I pulled my lips in. My body was tied to a machine that shocked my mind and muscles constantly in this never ending game. Yeah I was fucking tired. Jeff gently pushed my arm, "27 minutes and counting."

I walked to the armory in a groggy state. The doors swung open showing James and Liara talking about biotics. Both heads swung to me and James chuckled, "Man you look like shit Commander." I sighed and walked to my armor. I had already made it my own by using different designs and putting blue and green coloring in it. I slipped into it easily. It gently shaped itself to my skin and made me smile, "Do you want to come?" I asked placing my rifle into its slot. The only other weapon I had was my pistol and my bad ass biotics. James made a zipping motion with his fingers and threw away an invisible key. I patted his head in a 'good boy' manner. Liara smiled gently and touched my arm. We all loaded into the shuttle and I spotted Cortez giving me a great grin, "Ready to go, Commander?" he asked gripping the wheel and turning. He took off in a shot as if I had said yes. I gave an excited laugh as the movement sent butterflies through my body.

My glee at the flight suddenly came to a hault. The world in front of me exploded in a fiery ball of orange light. The colors exploded in front of me. A gasp escaped from my lips as a hand touched my shoulder,"What's wrong?" James asked from behind us, "Palavon." I whispered through tight lips, "A friend lives there." Liara offered softly as we closed onto the moon. Cortez's voice came suddenly making me flinch, "Landing area is full of Reapers." he said and I grit my teeth, "Open the door, we're going in hot."

As the door opened I pulled up my gun. Pulling the trigger was as smooth and as easy as muscle memory let it be. Two Husks dropped as blue exploded around them. My arm was filled with an electric buzz as my muscles bunched. I threw a ball of blue energy as it flared open and captured a husk, bringing him into the air. One shot to his head and he was gone, "Alright guys, stay on me tight. We're going to have to fight our way in." I ordered with two nods in response. My body buzzed slightly as it readied for another biotic attack. We jumped in time with each other as if we were one person and not three. Fog started around the edges of my helmet as we ran and shot. I realised just how 'out of shape' I was from my stay on Earth. My legs had already begun to scream out as I slid behind a rock. Not yet, not until we won this. A Husk wrapped it's arms around my body as I took a breath. I pushed the thing away with my left arm and brought my right arm up. With a flick of the wrist an orange blade appeared and sank into the mixed wiring and flesh of the creature. It fell as blue exploded onto me. I gagged on the thought of it and thanked everyone that my mask only provided me with air and no smell.

"FRIENDLIES!" The turien words brought me relief as we finally entered the camp, "You two okay?" I asked checking over my squad. Liara gave a quick nod and James laughed, "Always. Nothing like fighting Reapers in the morning." I rolled my hidden eyes and scanned the camp quickly gathering meager supplies, "You two know that you can breath in the air here, right?" Liara asked softly as I wiped the helmet again for clear sight. James and I took off our helmets and took in a breath of fresh air, "Why were we wearing those in the first place?" I asked and James shrugged, "I heard moon and I was thinking of our moon." I shook my head. I should have remembered that already. I was already losing touch.

We approached three turians discussing the Com towers. As two left we arrived, "General." I said and he looked down at me, "Commander Shepard." He almost sounded surprised. I felt a bit smug, "I've come to get Primarch Fedorian." The turien paused for a moment as his head bowed slightly. I watched his mandibles move slightly, "Primarch Fedorian is dead, his shuttle was shut down over an hour ago as he tried to leave the moon." his voice was harsh but his subharmonics rang in a tone of sadness. I reached out to touch his arm, "I am truly sorry to hear of his death. May the spirits guide him." I gently offered and the general turned slightly taking in my view, "He would have been an outstanding diplomat." he said suddenly with confidence dancing in his subharmonics. I nodded with a hard smile on my face. He moved slightly over and I dropped my hand, "What happens now?" I asked and Liara spoke up from my left, "The Turian hierarchy provides clear lines of succession."

The General met my eyes, "With so many deaths, Commander. It will be hard to find the next Primarch." He opened his Omni-Tool and ran his claws through the orange light quickly, "Palavon Command would know, If we could contact them." I looked at the red lights blinking on his map, "I heard about your communications tower as we walked up." He pressed a claw to the area of the tower on the map, "It's been jammed." I looked up with a bit of a grin, "And if I can fix it for you..." He nodded and crossed his arms, "I can get you the information you need." I nodded and picked up my rifle with a grin on my face, "We are on the job, General. See you in a few." He gave a turian version of a salute as we took off to the tower.

My gun came up as my body flared with electric energy, "Husks!" I yelled. I watched a Husk fly off of the side of the cliff in a bout of blue as Liara lifted her pistol. James had already lifted his weapon and snapped the nearest enemy with carnage. The battle was short and ended rather quickly. I gave a breath of frustration as my heat clip jammed, "Lola, you have to be gentle with the gun. Treat her like a queen." he teased as we neared the tower, "Imma 'bout to show you treat her like a queen with my foot up your ass, Vega." I growled before finally dislodging the clip and replacing it. Liara and I quickly gathered more clips as James chuckled. I opened the small computer on the tower before it flashed red, "Damnet, I need one of you up on that tower." I growled taking a step back to look up at how tall the damn thing was, "Which one?" James asked and I looked to Liara. She gave a smug grin and sauntered to the ladder, "How did I know." James scoffed and waved his fist in front of his heart, "Last time you tried to fix something I lost my Television." I shot to him as pain flared in my head. I fought against the memory and felt a nauseating sickness creep into my body. My mind kept the friendly headache as two blasts warned us of the incoming Husks.

My arm shot forward as a Hush shot back and my finger pulled back on the trigger mowing down another two. The gun in my hands let out a sigh and a few beeps. My fingers quickly pulled the old clip and threw it on the ground before placing another one in. A Husk snapped it's teeth in front of my face as I looked back up. Instantly I threw the thing into the air and shot it down. The quick charge of the biotic attack had made me feel weary. Kaidan's voice entered my head as I shot two more down, _"Remember, Biotic attacks are taking from your energy. If you build them using energy around you it won't suck everything out of you. Quick bursts will take directly from your body." _ Shuddup tutorial hot Kaidan with awesome abs... Stop it you're fighting... FUCK ME!

Pain flared up my arm as a Husk sunk its teeth into me. James gave a roar as his Omni blade sliced through the middle of its head like butter, "Commander?" he asked in a quick confirmation of my ok and I nodded. We turned back to the horde, "Almost done, Commander." Liara offered in a worried tone. I brought my gun up and let my biotics charge into my right arm. The pain along my wound doubled ad I threw another husk off of the cliff. Hissing in pain I learned my lesson quickly. We continued fighting the horde of monsters as the minutes slowly ticked by. I pushed my last clip into my gun and watched James bash in the skull of a Husk using the butt of his shotgun. Blood now covered my arm as my head felt a bit woozy. My Omni tool flashed on my arm and I pressed it quickly. The world seemed to stop. James' arms were in the air and a snarl lay frozen on his face as his blade sliced through the middle of a Husk. Liara was nearly to the bottom of the tower and her pistol was out. Her face was twisted slightly as a bullet sat at the opening with fire behind it. Three husks froze in a running stance at me before I looked down at my arm.

_Tip #23 do not forget to use Medi-Gel for all of your wounds. You may either use the tube or automatic application of your suit depending on your situation._

I reached into a pocket in my suit and dug out a small white container labeled 'human'. I gave a soft laugh before unscrewing the lid. My arm still throbbed as blood now fel at a slow pace. Squeezing out a small sum on my arm I watched the area it touched sizzle slightly and knit together. I rescrewed the lid and rubbed the gel over the length of the bite. My arm felt tired as I put the gel away. I looked back at the Omni tool.

_Medi-Gel will instantly heal flesh wounds but will take time to completely fix what is underneath. Remember that this quick fix will only mend flesh and muscle. Any broken bones, torn tendons, and fatigue can only be fixed by doctors. Medi-Gel will only be able to help the pain and fix smaller wounds around the areas. Stay safe, Competitor._

Taking a deep breath I pressed escape and pulled up my gun. The three Husks were gone in an instant, "General, we have fixed your tower." I said pressing into the tiny communication device that lay in my ear, "Thank you, Commander. I have news for you when you return." As Liara's feet touched the ground I was off in a shot. My squad followed me as we made it back to the Turian camp, "Jesus, Lola, ¿estás bien? You are running like your heels are on fire." As the metal door snapped up James took my arm in his. He looked over the pink of the new flesh and rubbed some of the blood away, "Estoy bien, James. See nothing." He nodded as if satisfied and gave the healed skin one more look before dropping my arm.

As I walked up to the General I watched his face turn from a worried boy to a hard ass Turian, "Everything is in chaos, Commander. So many dead or MIA." I shook my head feeling the hardness I needed to be the Commander fill my words, "I need someone, anyone. We need those resources now." I nearly bit out and watched the Turian almost flinch back as he looked at me. A chuckle reached my ears, "Don't worry Commander. I'll help you find the Primarch." Joy filled every limb I had as a grin spread across my face. There stood Garrus fucking Vakarian. I gazed over his body quickly and decided it was not as hot as his voice, but this was just a game and he was always there for the Commander. So alien man, come here often? I bent over as a pain flashed into my head.

_"Garrus!" I shouted happily from the kitchen. The grumbling Turian raised a plate above his eyes I dubbed "Strange alien eyebrow" as the smell of burnt beans went to his nose. The cook was on shore leave and I was sitting there trying to make myself a bean and cheese burrito. Damn I wanted one of those so badly. I turned back around as he grumbled again and shrugged. I knew EDI was getting on his nerves so his mood didn't bother me. I picked up the spoon and tried to save the quickly dying meal. I felt a hard body behind me as his arms went around my waist. I leaned back as Garrus' face gently touched mine as he rested his head on my right shoulder. His breath tickled my cheek and his mandibles flexed, "Mmm Jazzy, what are you ruining in here?" he asked. His subharmonics rumbled deeply making me shiver and smile, "I don't cook, I kill this is just..." I paused and Garrus laughed, "Too domestic for the great Commander Shepard?" he asked spinning me around so that we were nose to nose._

I took a deep breath and stood up straight as I had finally fought my out of the memory. Garrus just stood there as if he had just finished talking and waited for my response. The emotions built deep within me and I ran to hug his body tightly, "Garrus." I breathed and felt his arms around my waist, "Right behind you, Commander."


	6. Chapter 6

**5.**

**Been watching , Sherlock, and In The Flesh on BBC America and I'm late posting this chapter. Sue me.**

**If you want, when they get to the barrier and Shepard is on the turret I was listening to The Noisy Freaks by Tasty Network on Youtube.**

You know that moment that you hug a person fully wearing a suit of armor? Well as Garrus Vakarian hugged me back I could feel every pointy and hard point on his armor that was so different than mine. A roar and great rumbling of the ground under us broke us apart. I looked around and noted that every face was looking to the sky, "HARVESTER!" A turian yelled as a beast flew close to us before landing on the other side, "Commander, something is wrong with the Normandy. EDI isn't responding." Joker yelled suddenly. Liara nodded and ran to catch the shuttle to the Normandy, "Cortez, I'm on my way." she said pushing a finger into her ear, "I've got your location, Liara." he responded.

I looked up at the turian in front of me, "Ready to go?" I asked and he turned his hips in a cocky sway before pulling his gun to his shoulder, "Why would I let you have all the fun?" I laughed before my Omni Tool pulsed against my wrist. I shook my arm and rubbed my wrist, "How many biotic throws has she been using?" Garrus asked behind me and I could almost hear the worry in James' voice, "A lot." Why did that matter? This was just a game...

As we jumped to cover I listened to James' breathing, "Getting tired?" I asked in a cocky voice using his fatigue to hide behind my own, "Not used to the thin air, is all." he said raising his gun. I wiggled my fingers as the buzzing filled my body. The warm feeling of biotics charging in my body was soothing. it prickled slightly along the newly healed wound as I pushed a Husk off of the cliff side. If only I could use that power in bulk and push everything off.

I pulled up my weapon and shot a few rounds before seeing the first turian reaper. The sickening creature hissed and walked along with limbs that were stretched out too far. Black teeth gnashed behind bloated and rotting skin. Plates hung off haphazardly as spikes protruded from every angle of it's body. I was so used to the Husks, human zombies. It was something so pushed in front of us in our world. Blood and gore; human's being murdered; and even shows that were specially made to show us these horrors. But seeing another race in such a state. The Husks seemed tamed to them. Time slowed around me as I raised my gun to shoot. My finger paused for too long. A claw reached us to swipe down at me. I lifted my arm to block my face and throat. The air swirled around me in a putrid smell. One shot sounded as time continued. I shook and swallowed my nausea. The world spun for a moment before I rubbed the headache away.

I looked up to see Garrus lowering his gun slowly. The look on his face hard. His mandibles flared in a calming gesture... Why did I know that? I stood up slowly and looked around me. Two more explosions rang out around me. My fingers pressed on the Omni-Tool to open the settings menu. The world paused. I wanted out. Get me out! I fell onto my ass and screamed. I screamed and screamed so much that it hurt. I lay in tears with the creature staring at me with open eyes and a gaping mouth. It was just a game... just a game...

After a few minutes I looked back at the Omni-Tool. A message flashed in the upper right hand corner. I pulled it up and took in a deep breath wiping away tears.

_I don't have much time. They are watching our every move. They don't want any of the information to get out. They caused this. You are stuck inside of the game. Your body is being fed false memories and feelings. You must fight them or you will be consumed. So many have died for this 'game'.. _ As I read a red error message appeared as the text changed. _We are sorry for any inconvenience our machines are providing to you. If you would please finish the game we will make sure you will be paid greatly for your troubles. Remember to stay safe and choose wisely. We look forward to seeing you open your eyes._

_Bioware Team._

I wanted to scream again. This was so fucked! Everything around me crumbled as I lifted my gun. Let's kill some zombie Turians. I touched the orange on my wrist and let the world resume. Hisses and gurgling reached my ears. I pressed the trigger and didn't let go. As my gun gave a soft hiss I dropped it and threw wave after wave of biotic attacks. After my last attack I felt some knowledge click inside of my brain. I pulled both hands back and pushed them forward. With a flick of both wrists I let out a powerful shockwave that finished off the last of the enemies. The ground flared as pieces flew into the air. I took a deep breath before rubbing sore arms. A headache started to burn behind my ears, "Hey hey, Lola. Relax, you'll wear yourself out. We don't even have the Primarch yet." I threw my arms up, "It's Victus. Victus is the next Primarch. When we return to base they will want us to go to the front gate. I will use the turret until a brute makes me fall off." James took my arms in his hands and shook gently, "What are you talking about?" he asked and I balled my fists, "Nothing, we need to go."

As we returned General Corinthus he pointed us to the barrier. James gave me a look and twisted his mouth. I climbed the ladder quickly and pointed, "Alright boys, Turian on the left, Human on the right. I'll take the big bad gun right here." Garrus gave me a look before shoving me to the side, "I have a name."I shot him a look and rolled my eyes, "Get to it Vakarian." I shot and waved my hand. He gave a look of mock hurt before turning to the fiery balls of arriving Reapers. James touched my right arm quickly, "Esto no ha terminado, Lola. I want to know." I shook it off, "Eyes on the enemy, Vega." I ordered before jumping into the giant gun. It had two handles with two buttons and one goal. I would lie If I said shooting from a giant gun and moving from side to side wasn't fun and exciting, "Hell yeah!" I screamed as James chimed in, "Like fish in a barrel!" I lifted both arms in a woop before changing the giant heat sink, "Like fish in a what?" Garrus asked and James shot me a look while rolling his eyes. I gave a short laugh before continuing on my job. Two down before I had to change the heat sink again, "It's an old human term, just means this is really easy." I gave before a voice crackled to life in my ear, "Commander Shepard, I have the information you need. The next Primarch is Victus." I opened my eyes wide as the world rumbled, Oh please not now. A roar ripped through the air and pushed be forward. The angle that I had been bending at made the fall extremely painful.

My back lay on the metal as my legs hooked around. My back screamed at the angle. My right arm was hooked on one of the metal bars jutting from the top. When The second hit made me fall a pain flared through the right side of my body as a cracking sound reached my ears. My legs failed and let my body slam into the ground. My shield crackled and fell. The monster roared as fear filled my limbs. I tried to push up before rolling on my right side. My arm wasn't responding and felt numb. I shook my head and pushed myself up using my left arm. The Brute stared at me and roared again before charging. I took two steps in an attempt of a run. My already weak ankles gave in as my body tumbled to the left narrowly avoiding the big body as it ran into rock. It took a few steps back before shots made it turn around, "COMMANDER!" The combined voices made me smile. I rolled onto my back and threw my legs into the air. My body became stable and took my weight as I pulled a pistol with my left hand. I was a complete rightly but we would see how this went. I pulled the trigger and aimed for the things ass. A pained roar filled the air but I had to giggle. I shot it in its butt.. How old was I?

"We need to get the Primarch and get out now." I ordered when my quad ran up to me, "Your arm." James said and I refused to look at it. I knew the second I saw how bad it was I would seriously die of pain, "I fought with Victus this morning." Garrus gave and I nodded, "Show us." The pain would not leave my mind as I forced myself to go on. I was able to grit my teeth against most of the pain, "Commander." James offered gently trying to hand me a tube of Medi-Gel. I refused it. Any movement of my arm would make the pain come on strong. Right now it was a dull throbbing and a strong itching feeling. Two turians came into view, "Where is Victus?" Garrus asked and I turned my head to take a deep breath missing any more conversation. We started our move again. Running this time into what sounded like battle, "SHIT!" I hissed out spotting two more brutes as we entered the side camp. I used my pistol until it was empty. I remembered this portion was easy. I used my left arm to throw two grenades and gave a short laugh as it ended the fighting quickly.

A new Turian with white markings walked forward, "Good to see you alive, Vakarian." They held each other's forearms before nodding to each other, "I thought I lost you back there, or you ran off." humor rang in the new turian's sub-harmonics, "As I recall your words were 'keep that thing off my men'." The new turian nodded before glancing to me, "Commander Shepard? We need to get you medical attention..." I raised my good hand, "When you come with us to the Normandy, Primarch." The turian pulled in his mandibles before letting them flare in a sigh, "Me? Politics? I prefer the field. I know war better..." I nodded, "And that is what makes you perfect right now. We are at war, Victus. We need someone who knows what they are doing." he shook his head, "I don't.. If I leave the moon will fall." his sub-harmonics pleading with me almost silently, "If you don't, Palavon will fall." I knew it was harsh but he set his mandibles and nodded. James turned to the side and touched his ear, "Cortez..."

Victus reached out to take my right arm and I shook my head, "N..." Pain flared as he tried to lift it. Crippling pain flew through my body as I looked to it. Bone jutted out at a sickening angle. Blood ran down torn flesh and bone. It was twisted into a mess of flesh and bone.

Suddenly I was laying on a metal bed in a white room screaming. I locked against some sort of restraints, "CALM HER DOWN!" Men in white masks suddenly flew into my vision. I looked to my arm. It had tubes flowing from my veins and random shit stuck to it. It was tied at the wrist to a bed. A beeping reached my ears. Was that my heart beat?

"She's going into cardiac arrest!" "I don't care just do it!" The vision in front of me changed to worried faces as someone carried my body. My right arm lay across my belly twisted and ruined. I turned my head and threw up before falling into a cold sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

_**5 1/2**_

I sighed in frustration. I had to wait for a full hour as my bone fully mended together. This is a fucking video game. Just patch me up and let me on. I looked out of the window on the observation deck and sighed softly. How long until I returned home. I was beginning to forget their faces. We were still 10 hours away from Grissom Academy and I was thinking of finally going to sleep. Images of blood and dead bodies flashed in front of my eyes whenever they closed. As much as I wanted to I still hadn't gone to see Garrus. Would I finally choose to romance Kaidan this time around? A fiery hot pain flushed through my body as a memory fought to be apart of me. No think of my dog. My mom and dad and how happy they will be to have their little girl back. The weariness that fought it's way into my body was hard to keep back. I walked to the elevator quickly avoiding the eyes of the few crew members gathered around the table to eat. I pressed the number one quickly. EDI slipped in quickly and pressed the number 2. I smiled softly at her and she tried to return the favor, "You did not seem surprised when I took this form." she noted and I laughed, "A body that you could control, The question was just when." She nodded and paused as the doors opened, "James told me about what you had said on your mission. And you are different from the rest of them but not much. My memories of you seem bland and coded like my programs. You're not from here." she stated more as a fact before placing a robotic arm out to stop the door from closing, "You can talk to me, Commander. I can see the struggle within you. I am here." She touched my arm and left. The doors shut and I was in my bed in seconds. Staring at the stars whizzing by I fell into a deep sleep.

_Miranda screamed out at me as the beast rose again. The giant Husk like monster tried to kill us. It opened it's mouth and spat out a hot white laser that made me sweat even while taking cover. Garrus' talons had pushed past the soft leather in one of the junctions of my armor. His grip was tight as we shook from the monsters force. Beads of red started to roll down the exposed blade like nails. Blue rolled down an open wound on his shoulder, "We can't keep this up, Commander." he growled out and I laughed, "Where's your sense of adventure?" I asked in a cocky tone and he touched my face as Miranda's bullets made the beast retreat for the moment, "It was gone the day you died. I can't live through that again." My chin wobbled slightly as I touched the burnt side of his face, "There is no Shepard without Vakarian."  
_

_I closed my eyes before jumping to my feet to fire at the beast. The world changed around me. I was back on Earth in a field. It seemed so empty. No voices or gunfire. Laughter and the gentle sounds of buzzing were gone. I sat down and crossed my legs. A body sat besides me with a huff. I looked over to see Kaidan with a grin and two bottles in his hands, "Shore leave is amazing." he said and I nodded with a smile taking a bottle. It felt nice to be near him but I missed something. He touched me and I flinched back, "Sorry, cold fingers." he gave a laugh before downing his drink. I looked at the sky before looking down. The world changed again._

_Kaidan sneered at me from his position, "You work for them now." he shot at me as if I had yelled at him first. I put a fist on my hip and pulled my lips back in anger, "I was DEAD, they brought me back to life. I don't work FOR them Kaidan. I work with them. We share a common goal!" I waved my hands in the air as if it was going to help my point. The world shook underneath me. I started to run. Garrus and Miranda were in front of me. Miranda jumped into the Normandy followed by Garrus. The ground fell in front of me. I was forced to make a leap of faith. I scratched uselessly at metal as pain entered my middle from the collision. A hand grabbed mine, "Goodbye, Commander." I looked into Kaidan's eyes and screamed. He let me fall._

"ETA two hours, Commander!" Joker's voice woke me from my dreams. I shook and balled my hands into fists. I was alive and well. I survived the suicide mission, I survived being spaced, I was Commander fucking Shepard. I would survive this. As I went to take a shower I shot a look at my computer. A light blinked on the playback button. I walked back over and pressed it. There I sat pulling my hair with tears in my eyes. Why didn't I remember this?

_"You have to fight it you know... The pain that begins in your head every time you fight means you win. This isn't your life. Your real name is Jasemin C Tez. You live in state Oklahoma in the United States. You want to go to England and Japan. You have a family and pets. Friends and dreams. This place, they, keeps trying to make me forget, don't forget."_

The message receives a red error message before erasing itself. Someone didn't want me watching that. They, They who? I remember that I am stuck here but how. I touched my head and took in a deep breath. Gabe and I were standing in line for something but what? Fear dug itself a nice home in my gut and sang happily as I began to feel sick. A shadow walked from the corner of my room. I felt my biotics flare in response, "Relax, Lola." I shook my head, "James, but..." He gave me a sad look, "I was able to see the whole thing. This is just a game in your world. In order to go home you have to beat the Reapers. Which is possible from your message. You said that they can't erase what they can't see. So when your asleep they have no control over us." I went to respond before he hugged me, "I know you have the memories I have. I heard that from your own mouth. As much as I want you to stay here and watch you start a family so that I can spoil them rotten. You have a family out there. We need to get you back." He looked so dead set on it as he pulled away, "I'm forgetting them." I whispered as I dropped my head James made me look him in the eye, "I wont let you."


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N So sorry guys, I have completely fallen out of my mood for these stories. That and I'm finally going to backpack around Europe for a year in the next week! YAY! Luckly a reader by the name of FaceOvBoe has asked to take on the in her own version. She is going to revamp the earlier chapters and add a few tweaks. She even said she might make a version of "Getting Lost in The Game" In which the game works and they make 'video diary's' similar to Avatar about losing their minds to the fake reality. I am sorry y'all have had to wait and now have to go to someone else to read it. I'll keep the old story on. Bye guys and hopefully you'll enjoy it.  
_

_ /u/2313455/FaceOvBoe - edit into your url to go directly to her page.  
_


End file.
